Time
5/27/2019
You are
slipping out of my mind…
I already
said that I do not want to forget you, but am afraid am doing it slowly.
I am one of
those people who actually believe in the power of time. I was barely 18 when I
realized my mom was right, time does have the power of blurring feelings until
they fade.
I criticized
you for the life you carried on but today I realized am not better than you. I
don’t like the person I’ve become. I spend my time saying how much I hate my
life, the life that I chased, the one that I fought for.
Is there
someone who knows all the answers? Maybe we all know them but refuse to follow
that right pattern. We enjoy our fake lives of lies, lust and sin.
I run away
of my life cause I was convinced that being a housewife was not for me. That
the world was waiting for me to dare to chase my dreams. I paid the price. In
the end, as I told you, everyone was so proud of me and I just felt like I traded
my soul.
Yesterday
was and would have been our anniversary. Is funny how the most we grapple to
things, the most we get hurt.
I hate when
dates lost its meaning. Like if, time doesn’t care about all they represent when it should stop and wait until we are ready to go on. At the, end it all
works as a reminder that life happens while we expect that solutions come across
the door.
I’ve been
living this past 4 months as if I was on a parallel universe. Believing not
that deep down that all this is temporary. Even in my brighter days, I don’t totally
buy it. I refuse to call this home.
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